My Dream Man

If you’re a girl, most likely you have “The List” or have been told you need to have “The List”. (At least for most of my readership. :)) If you’re a guy, you most likely know about or have “The List”. If you haven’t heard of it, “The List” is a list that some people encourage girls and guys alike to have. It lists all the qualities that you would like your future spouse to have. However, I — yes, again — got to thinkin’. 😉 “The List” displays a lack of trust in God. True, it’s good to remember that you want to marry a Christian, virgin, etc. but to list that you want “a strong leader”, “a guy who likes kids”, “a girl who’s willing to hunt”, “someone who likes punk pop”, etc. is almost pointless, and not to mention self-reliant. The way it’s pointless is that you most likely won’t be interested in someone who doesn’t share the same interests. Obviously, a hunter is not going to hang out with/be interested in a girl who’s huge into PETA. And similarly, a girl who adores kids won’t be interested in/hang out with a guy who couldn’t stand them. It displays self-reliance in the way that we believe we know ourselves and needs and wants better than God Himself does. Does He not number the hairs on our heads? Does He not care for us, sometimes giving us situations we did not wish for, knowing that it will be advantageous to us in the end? So why would we try to override His omniscient knowledge with our trivial lists? Also, as a sidenote, this is all trivial. Does it really matter in the end whether or not someone listens to a certain style of music or watches a certain genre of movies? (Considering the choice of music/movies isn’t evil, of course. :P)

One last thought: A good friend of mine once saw one girl’s “The List” and said that lists like that intimidate him, since he knows he cannot be that man all the time. His attitude was one of “Why bother? I know I’ll never be able to achieve that anyway, so pursuing her would be purposeless.” Even though the girl who wrote the list probably understood that the man she marries will never be that way all the time, she didn’t realize that her standards might scare away some completely potential and worthy young men.

Maybe it’s just a good idea to get rid of lists altogether. Hold certain standards but remain open. Only God knows what is best for you. Why try to plan what only God knows?


~ by neverxxforsaken on June 18, 2009.

One Response to “My Dream Man”

  1. If you have “The List,” you probably believe in “The One.”

    It might be surprising to a lot of people just how much room they can and will give to their spouse when they marry. We’ll be changing after we marry too…

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